I’ve said it a million times, but I’ll say it once more: Will Smith is one of the nicest celebrities I’ve interviewed.

And that’s not just because I feel I’m chilling out with the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air every time we sit down for a chat. It’s more that infectious beaming smile that could probably broker peace, and the way he treats everyone — from reporters to fans to service staff — with friendly respect and utmost graciousness.

The 44-year-old Oscar nominee answers every question so sincerely and thoughtfully that even cynical journos find it impossible not to be disarmed by this father of three.

And for all the industry rumours that range from Smith and actress-wife Jada’s widely debated parenting skills and supposed nepotism to make their kids as famous as they are, to losing his summer box office draw magic (After Earth’s been getting flak), we’re challenging anyone to step forward and deny his indomitable work ethic, beliefs and love for his children.

All of which became evident during our chat a while back, as we discussed the post-apocalyptic sci-fi yarn by M Night Shyamalan. It stars Smith and 14-year-old son Jaden a father and son team whose bonding mission on a space flight turns into a life-and-death excursion. And it turns out that for Smith, parenting is as equally important off screen.

You first acted alongside Jaden in The Pursuit of Happyness. What did you learn about your son this time around?

Will Smith: I think I was probably most surprised by his will power and determination. On this movie, I really took a step back. Jaden and I agreed that I would give him a little bit of room and let him work through things on his own. I was really surprised at how hard he worked and how much more he was doing on his own than he would have done with me pushing him. For example, the choices to do another take, the choices to push himself, and how his discipline kicked in from having freedom.

We couldn’t find your charming natural self in After Earth ...

Awww my charming natural self? (Laughs) Cypher (Smith’s character) is a full character performance. There are a few funny things, but not a lot, and it comes from a different kind of comedy. This is a parenting story. It’s a father and son in a really extreme circumstance. There is not a lot of room for fun and bubbly. (Laughs)

Cypher the Dad seems markedly different from Will Smith the Dad. Especially when it comes to you and Jada’s belief about parenting and how you “don’t do punishment”.

Our concept is, as young as possible, give them as much control over their lives as possible and the concept of punishment, from our experience has a little too much of a negative quality. Jaden … can do anything he wants as long as he explains to me why that was the right thing to do for his life.

It sounds too good to be true. Aren’t you afraid that he’s going abuse his freedom?

It seems like that would be the case. And I’ve only done it with my children. But, you know, you’d be very surprised with the decisions that kids make when they feel real, true responsibility for their lives. Like for example, I don’t believe in ordering them to clean their room. I tell them: “This is not your room, this is our room. We are letting you borrow our room till you’re 18 years old. So, please respect the gift that we’re giving you and clean up my room.” In the same way, I could say: “If I lend you my car, dude, don’t let my car get dirty like that!” How ridiculous is it for me to tell you to clean your car?

Have you and Jada ever been conflicted about your kids in showbiz?

Essentially, the only conflict in that sense is getting the rules down. The rule in our house is that you can do anything that you want and we don’t pull the parent card, until danger is involved. There was this big deal about Willow (their daughter) shaving her head. But, hey, she didn’t cut my hair, she cut her own hair. It grows back. It’s those kind of things that give kids autonomy over their space.

You mentioned before it’s very different from the way you were brought up.

Yes, I was brought up where you don’t even talk to your parents about what your opinion is. You’re not allowed to have an opinion. When you pay some bills, then you’re allowed to have an opinion. And yes, my parents let me talk now. (Laughs) Cypher was a very similar take on my father. He was in the military, too, the air force. My father was hard, but not quite as hard as Cypher. A big part of my relationship with my father and a big part of my relationship with Jaden is similar in that I was raised in the family business. I never had a job outside the family. My father owned an ice house, so those bags of ice you see in the supermarkets, we would bag those and deliver them. And the lessons that I learnt were learnt in the harshness of the environment of the survival of the family.

Any negative side to working with Jaden?

For him, the same as with any parent-child relationship in this circumstance. The thing that I’ve created is so huge, it seems that a drawback would be — does he feel like he can ever live up to that? It’s like, there could be a weight, and he doesn’t notice it. I’m just his dad right now. So I would be concerned that he would feel a sense of inadequacy in not being able to achieve and attain the things I was able to.

What is your fondest childhood memory with your father?

I accidentally electrocuted my father one time. (Laughs) We had a job to do, there was a storm in Philadelphia, and one of the supermarkets we were dealing with, the basement was flooding. So he needed to go in to disconnect all the freezer cases because the water was coming up to the electrical boxes.

I was supposed to be holding the flashlight but I had been out to a party the night before, all night long, I was exhausted (and dropped it). And I just remember him getting shocked, and it was just like in the cartoons! When you see somebody get shocked and their hair stands up, with smoke and all that? He didn’t think it was funny.

All through the summer, his fingers were cooked, so he had to sit on the porch. I just remember how mad he was and how hilarious it was for me. And there was a weird thing in his mind — that he was mad, but he was so happy that I learnt that lesson. That it’s not a joke and you don’t go out the night before you have to work the next day. I was 13 years old. (Laughs)