There’s an old adage about how one should never meet one’s childhood idols.

But that doesn’t play when the idols in question are the most sensational, inspirational, celebrational, Muppetational Muppets.

For this writer who spent all her formative years weaned on a steady diet of Kermit, Miss Piggy, Fozzie The Bear, Animal, Gonzo and gang, the chance to interview visionary Jim Henson’s beloved furry felt friends was a lifelong dream come true.

Back on the silver screen following their 2011 box-office smash The Muppets, the entire gang is in Muppets Most Wanted, together with new co-stars Ricky Jervais, Tina Fey and Ty Burrell, as they go on a global show tour while being unwittingly entangled in an international crime spree.

And 35 years after their first ever live-action feature film, The Muppet Movie, they are still teaching me about life’s trials and tribulations, one joyfully silly gag reel at a time. It’s time to play the music, it’s time to light the lights, as we get down with the world’s most famous amphibian, his sassy-snouted girlfriend and newcomer Constantine (the self-styled World’s Number One Criminal).

Q: Okay, guys. ’Fess up. Who’s the most difficult Muppet to work with?

Kermit: Uh, well, we all have our moments.

Constantine: Yes, but some of us have more moments than others. Some of us make more demands than other. Some of us have more luggage than others. And some of us can hit with the very painful karate chop.

Miss Piggy: Oh, really? Who are you talking about?

Constantine: I’d rather not say.

Kermit: Good answer.

Q: Would anyone of you say that you’re a method Muppet?

Kermit: You mean, what is my acting technique? I wouldn’t say I’m a method actor. I’m what they call an amphibian thespian. I took acting lessons at the Swampizlavski Acting and Swimming School. It’s all about getting in touch with your inner tadpole — and being willing to drop your tail on stage.

Miss Piggy: Moi’s acting style is simple: Point camera at moi. Stand back! Accept Academy Award. Unfortunately I’m still waiting for the last part.

Q: Was there rivalry behind the scenes? Arguments about amount of screen time each Muppet got?

Kermit: I didn’t see any real rivalries. We Muppets have been working together for quite a while, so we don’t squabble over things like “screen time”.

Miss Piggy: Right. As long as I get more “screen time” than anyone else. And more costume change ... and musical numbers ... and top billing.

Constantine: As we said while the making the movie: If pig is happy, set is happy. If pig is not happy, no one happy.

Q: Did you guys pull any pranks on set?

Kermit: I didn’t pull any pranks. Did you, Miss Piggy?

Miss Piggy: Moi? Pull pranks! Never! I have people who do that for me. We’re shopping it around as a reality show.

Constantine: Okay, so I am the bad guy again. It is true that because I look so much like Kermit (even though I am much more handsome), I fooled the other Muppets into thinking that I was him. Is very funny. And for a criminal mastermind like me, very profitable. You want to know more? See movie.

Q: Who’s the biggest prankster on set?

Kermit: Constantine.

Miss Piggy: Constantine.

Constantine: Is unanimous, I am not only world’s number one criminal, but also world’s number one prankster. I am very proud of this accomplishment. Is biggest thing to happen to me since I escaped from the prison.

Q: Were there any Spinal Tap moments on set?

Kermit: Well, when Muppets get together, strange things always happen: Stampeding bulls, exploding souffles, boomerang fish and Fozzie’s jokes. It’s very much like behind the scenes at Spinal Tap.

Miss Piggy: Is she talking about the rock group or the medical procedure?

Constantine: Both.

Q: Kermit and Miss Piggy, which celebrities are you dying to work with?

Kermit: We’ve worked with so many stars. In fact, Muppets Most Wanted is wall-to-wall with big celebrities — from Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett to Tom Hiddleston and Diddy.

Miss Piggy: All of them are close personal friends of mine, of course.

Kermit: Over the years, a lot of stars have worked with the Muppets ...

Miss Piggy: Every single one of them close personal friends of mine.

Kermit: ... but we’re always happy to work with any star who will work with us. So if you’re a celebrity and you want to work with the Muppets, give us a call.

Miss Piggy: Who knows, maybe someday you could be a close personal friend of mine, too.

Q: What was it like working with Tina Fey and Ricky Jervais?

Kermit: Tina Fey is incredibly funny. She plays Nadya the head of the prison where I’m being held. And she falls in love with me.

Miss Piggy: I think she took her part a little too seriously. She may be an incredibly talented and funny actress, but when it comes to my frog, she needs to back off.

Kermit: It was just acting.

Miss Piggy: Yeah, and I suppose you were acting like you enjoyed it.

Kermit: Sheesh! And, uh, as for Ricky, he’s as funny off camera as he is on-camera.

Constantine: Is true. Ricky is a funny comedian, but I don’t think he would make it as a real criminal. He steals scenes when he should be stealing jewellery!

Miss Piggy: Both Tina and Ricky are close personal friends, but you probably guessed that.

Q: Constantine, what makes you a better actor than Kermit?

Constantine: Let’s be honest, Kermit is great actor. But he is too nice. Nice guys are fine, but bad guys like me are much more fun to watch. Who doesn’t like watching villains? I am like Darth Vader, only shorter and greener and with a mole ... and I don’t make that strange breathing sound. What is that all about, anyway?

Q: Kermit and Miss Piggy, what are you most proud of?

Miss Piggy: I’m very proud of Muppets Most Wanted. I really think it’s our funniest movie and moi’s most Oscar-worthy performance ever.

Kermit: I hope you win.

Miss Piggy: I better.

Kermit: Me? I’m just proud that the Muppets are still out there singing, dancing and making people happy. I hope we can do it forever.

Q: Answer this million dollar question once and for all: Are you two dating?

Kermit: We have a long-standing professional and personal relationship.

Miss Piggy: In fact, it’s the longest-running interspecies relationships in Hollywood.

Kermit: So, technically we are dating. But we are not married.

Miss Piggy: I’m working on that. Okay, we answered your question. Where’s our million dollars?

Q: You’ve both had such a varied and illustrious career. What haven’t you done that you really want to do?

Kermit: What I really want to do is direct.

Miss Piggy: What I really want to do is get married to Kermit.

Kermit: What I really want to do is direct a movie in a sticky hot swamp.

Miss Piggy: In which case, I’ll just wait till you get back to marry you.

Q: Kermit, you don’t seem to have a problem with nudity. Have you ever used a body double?

Kermit: Frogs are almost always naked. In the swamp, clothes don’t make a lot of sense. It’s tough to swim wearing a three-piece suit and tasseled loafers. I know. I’ve tried. As for a body double: No, I’ve never used one — or even a stunt double. It’s tough to find short green stunt men in Hollywood. And if you don’t believe me, ask Yoda.

Q: The Muppets’ legendary style of comedy has withstood the test of time. What do you think is the appeal?

Kermit: I think folks identify with us. When people see the Muppets on screen, they can see themselves and their friends.

Miss Piggy: They must have some pretty weird friends.

Kermit: Exactly. Everybody does. Ours are just a little weirder than most.

Miss Piggy: Also, audiences adore the chemistry that Kermie and moi have on camera. What we have together is indescribable.

Kermit: I know I sure can’t describe it.

Q: Asia is a hot place to make Hollywood movies right now. Have you ever visited Singapore? And will you ever do a Muppets movie in Singapore?

Miss Piggy: I adore Singapore. But, unfortunately, I have never been there. However, if you send me a first class ticket and put me up in a five-star hotel, I’d be delighted to come for an extended stay.

Kermit: I don’t think they’re offering to fly us there and put us up.

Miss Piggy: It never hurts to ask.

Kermit: We’d love to make a movie in Singapore. I can see it now: Intrigue, excitement, music, laughs, international star cameos ...

Miss Piggy: And, most of all, moi.

Kermit: Of course.

Muppets Most Wanted opens in cinemas tomorrow.