We’re willing to bet you can’t stay in a hotel overseas without first checking its reviews on TripAdvisor. I know because I go to it for my fix of reviews, even when I’m not actually travelling to a particular country. But come on, isn’t it fun to read what others have to say about hotels that just opened, or find out about out-of-reach properties you know you can never afford to stay in?

The website celebrated its 15th birthday last month and, to me, reviews of hotels remain the beating heart of TripAdvisor’s appeal even while it adds other useful functions such as Near Me Now, which pinpoints what you have around you; and Just For You, which provides customised hotel recommendations.

Admittedly, I’m embarrassed to confess I’m a lot less active when it comes to writing reviews on the site, as compared to reading them. But let me share what I truly find gratifying, useful and absolutely entertaining about TripAdvisor — reading a fellow Singaporean’s reviews. Of course, there are many reviewers of other nationalities who leave hilariously scathing comments such as this zinger: “Unfortunately, the fart smell entered our room and kept us company for the rest of the night.” That was written about a hotel in Taiwan, which not surprisingly was given a one-star rating, as was this hotel in Malacca, because the verdict was: “Beautiful appearance but with bad heart.” How could anyone resist clicking on reviews like these?

But there’s nothing like a critical compatriot to let you know if a hotel matches up to our exacting standards. I feel Singaporeans are more or less attuned to one another’s sensibilities; and while there will always be those who like to complain for the sake of it (yes, some of us need to manage our expectations), I’d like to think we have matured enough as travellers to know what’s acceptable within reason. I never fail to take their reviews to heart when making a hotel reservation because, you know, I’m Singaporean that way.

So while we may leave strangely ludicrous, nitpicky and uniquely Singaporean comments on TripAdvisor, they’re fairly balanced out. Here are some gems that reveal a little of our psyche when it comes to the way we like our hotels:

WE PARTICULARLY DISLIKE BEING MISLED

“The room was .... Well, let’s just say if we had to pay for it, I would be MOST upset. The garden view is the view of the coconut tree tops. I mean, I am Singaporean. If I wanted to see that, I could have stayed home, so yeah.”

“They advertised that the double rooms would sleep four, I suspect they meant dwarfs. Two- and-a-half large Asians struggled to sleep comfortably.”

“The view faces the ‘beach’ which looks like marshland.”

“The Nespresso machine used fake Nespresso capsules, and only one chair in the room. So if you order room service, someone has to either sit on the bed or the floor.”

“Was given a rug as face/hand towel and insisted by front office manager that it was fine.”

“Our family went with the impression that we were going to a luxury hilltop villa, but we went away feeling like we stayed in a chalet instead.”

“I think the hotel should call (it)Ferry Terminal view instead of Sea Facing.”

WE CARE ABOUT THE GADGETS IN OUR ROOMS

“The television is a Sony Bravia ... an old model. I must say it’s a small size for a five-star hotel.”

“The bathroom was very low-tech — even the auto loo had seen better days!”

“They should have planted enough routers for Wi-Fi…”

“The only complaint is the small LCD TV. For the size of the rooms, you can easily fit a 47-inch or 50-inch TV.”

“S$960 AND NO CABLE!”

WE CARE EVEN MORE ABOUT THE FOOD

“My teeth’s encounter with the iceberg lettuce in the salad was akin to the Titanic’s fate.”

“Standard breakfast set, which is salad, tasteless scrambled eggs and either waffle, pancake OR bread. That’s all.”

“The girl working the egg station does not know how to fry an egg.”

“Breakfast spread was okay only. Hash browns were not crispy for the two mornings I had.”

“They should stop packing the nasi lemak in small packets as the chilli and condensation made the rice too soggy and unpresentable.”

WE CAN BE ABSOLUTELY INANE

“Waves can be very loud at night.” (This was a review for a beachside hotel.)

“The bathroom is indeed slippery when wet — not to mention cold.”

BUT MOST OF ALL, WE’RE PRETTY FAIR

“All in all, this hotel is like Teri Hatcher: Past her prime, but still attractive enough to make you stay with her.”